Meanwhile, caught somewhere in between the land of Oz, and the wizard of Id, captain cave man was actually able to re-secure a few of his lost freedoms!
On November 20, 2013, still without a lawyer, I had to appear in court representing myself to get my bail conditions loosened up. This in itself was an incredibly daunting task as I drill oil wells, not act as legal defense in criminal cases before the courts. But by then I'd had plenty of chances to watch the complete fuck-ups from legal aid, and pick up on how this sort of thing was generally supposed to be done. What choice did I have? I had to give it my best shot.
I patiently waited for my turn. Those represented by attorneys and/or those in custody disputes go first, then the student lawyers get their kick at the can, and finally the crown asked the general audience that if anybody had anything else to be brought to the court that they should speak up. I raised my hand and approached the counter.
Learning from a failure of one of my former attorneys, I made absolutely sure I had a copy of everything. I also made sure I had an additional copy for the crown, another for the judge, and one for myself. The evidence that I brought forward was a copy of my official acquittal, my letter in response to my lawyer's plea deal, a copy of the letter of complaint against her, and miscellaneous other supporting documentation including correspondence between myself, legal aid and the law society of Canada. I also had a copy of a report from my court appointed shrink. This report was based on his two and a half years of examining me as a patient. His report did nothing to harm me. Actually, in his reports, he used words which described me as the victim. He mentioned that because I was falsely accused and fully exonerated, there was no justification to still have me under what he described as the harshest conditions he's seen to date. He insisted that I be allowed to return to work and live on my own, and that failure to do so could potentially begin to cause me to develop mental health issues.
With confidence I started to give out the copies, figuring that truth and common sense would prevail and I could get my bail conditions loosened. I was quickly disappointed. Before I could even get into why I was there, they refused to enter all said paperwork and tried to remand the case for nearly another month! Another month!? At this point, I had spent years going in and out of court rooms. I'd seen them drag their asses and act unprofessionally regarding the most important things that affected my life while they let ridiculousness and abject stupidity run rampant. All theses years, I had been told time and time again to keep my mouth shut, while my idiotic defense explained why they didn't bother to prepare for court that day. I though: "Fuck it, I've had enough!"
I asked the judge straight out;
"If I've been acquitted of all charges that started this whole mess, and the two bogus breach charges they put on me, then why the hell am I still under a bail order that involves two separate cases which were concluded in court?!" The crown prosecution quickly contested any bail variations, and they also said they refused to drop the no contact order between my girlfriend and I.
What a dick.
Needless to say I was pissed off by now. How do you possibly win at this? Showing up prepared doesn't seem to mean jack shit. When I had a chance I asked the judge;
"You're honour, my bail conditions are so convoluted that no one can possibly make any sense of them anymore. Under these conditions, should my roommate's wife return to him on December first, I will have to leave that house! And according to those conditions, if I'm not there, I will need to return to jail immediately. And because the other order is so poorly written, I would have to obtain "prior written consent" to be away from the house arrest residence and arrange for the police to pick me up and take me to jail. In other words, I would need approval to go back to jail!" I then asked:
"Why should I have to return to jail when I was acquitted of all charges?!" They were having none of this from me. The judge pleaded with a lawyer to go talk to me elsewhere. The lawyer, caught unaware, obliged the judge. We spoke for a little while, and the lawyer took my complaints to the crown. In the end, my house arrest was dropped! They also dropped the no contact order against my girlfriend whom I haven't seen in five long ass months. That no contact order was drawn up because they claimed I assaulted her. Yet in her official statement on the events detailed in "Seal Team 6 Vs Tortured", she insists she was never assaulted by me on that night or any other. They would not drop that phantom assault charge, but they were going to let me continue to be around her. How do you like that one? That's your government.
Anyways, finally after all this time, I could be with my girlfriend and try to get back to work. I thought about how I was going to travel down to Calgary to get my own clothes, my work attire, and my safety tickets so I could begin the process of returning to work. But before I could celebrate, they pulled another shithead move on me. They tell me;
"Yes [Tortured], you are now allowed to talk to, see and date your girlfriend, but she cannot stay over night because you are still charged with assaulting her. If you beat her again, it will be our fault." This was the bail supervisor telling me this. Unbelievable! It is just incredible how stupid and insulting these people can be at the exact same time! I never assaulted her the first time, but even if I did, what logic are they employing to justify not allowing her to stay overnight? Is it somehow impossible that I could beat her during the day? This is just ridiculous! Think of how you would react in this sort of situation? Of course if I expressed any righteous indignation, they would say "see, he is a angry person after all. This is why we can't allow you to see your girlfriend."
Let's review. My girlfriend writes a statement that proves the police were lying. She confirmed herself that I never assaulted her. Yet they start off by charging me with 22 counts of assault and weapons charges, including the phantom abuse of my girlfriend which they had ZERO evidence of. Then they reduced my charges to 11 counts, and just a while ago, they offered me 18 months if I plead guilty to two of those charges. One of them being the phantom abuse charge, which apparently isn't that much of a worry, as they are now going to let me see my girlfriend again, (at least during the day, when there is zero chance of me abusing her again). Does anybody else's head hurt from all this bullshit. These pricks knew I was not violent, and they knew I wasn't a rapist, and they knew I never breached my bail conditions. When is enough, enough?! How much more professional people's time and taxpayer dollars are we going to squander on this nonsense?!
Undoubtably, more to come. I hope you're entertained.
-Tortured.
