My Wife dedicated this song to me in one of my darkest days. Sometimes she could just see things that I couldn't................... TORTURED
Sunday, 31 May 2015
Thursday, 21 May 2015
A milestone goes uncelebrated...(blog 106)
Today is a milestone that will not be celebrated but loathed as it should be. 4 years ago today my plight began with a false allegation. I would like to say that much has changed that in fact I have regained that which I lost but I cannot. I am still suspended in a state of constant anxiety furthered by the state by the constant harassment that started quite some time ago in an effort to discredit me before a trial for being a rapist. A trial in which I was given a forced acquittal and looking back I should have somehow forced them to continue with the trial and been exonerated by a Jury. However a lot of things are beyond my control.
In 4 years I have had some good milestones. My twin Grandboys who were 5 months premature are very well and thriving through life. I have yet to be convicted of anything I was accused of as of yet, although next Month may be a different issue. My therapist would agree with me That they seem to be Hell bent on finding some guilt in me of something, anything just to say there was guilt and justify their actions.
He also agrees that their pursuit of myself is likely geared towards this Blog I write. He feels that I am a threat to them. The threat isn't because I am criminally inclined in anyway but rather that I confront the truth, expose that which they did and still do.
Anyways, you know how I could go on. Instead I'll end with this. Not sure what the next 4 years look like but I will keep fighting on as I told and promised my torturers I would. You know, all they had to say was "we are sorry" and left me alone. I would have accepted that, even choked down the excuse they were just doing their job and moved on. Instead they hold me like a fly, like a child slowly pick me apart never realizing that it is a life they hold, a law they break without any emotional regard for who I am.
Today I'm going to listen to this song, pretend I get a sick day, vacation or that it's all over. Tomorrow I'll move on to continue to fight back and hopefully effect positive change in the system somewhere ,somehow.
"Gunna put the world away for a minute, pretend I don't live in it".
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9n5G0qFBsHM
See you again soon
TORTURED
In 4 years I have had some good milestones. My twin Grandboys who were 5 months premature are very well and thriving through life. I have yet to be convicted of anything I was accused of as of yet, although next Month may be a different issue. My therapist would agree with me That they seem to be Hell bent on finding some guilt in me of something, anything just to say there was guilt and justify their actions.
He also agrees that their pursuit of myself is likely geared towards this Blog I write. He feels that I am a threat to them. The threat isn't because I am criminally inclined in anyway but rather that I confront the truth, expose that which they did and still do.
Anyways, you know how I could go on. Instead I'll end with this. Not sure what the next 4 years look like but I will keep fighting on as I told and promised my torturers I would. You know, all they had to say was "we are sorry" and left me alone. I would have accepted that, even choked down the excuse they were just doing their job and moved on. Instead they hold me like a fly, like a child slowly pick me apart never realizing that it is a life they hold, a law they break without any emotional regard for who I am.
Today I'm going to listen to this song, pretend I get a sick day, vacation or that it's all over. Tomorrow I'll move on to continue to fight back and hopefully effect positive change in the system somewhere ,somehow.
"Gunna put the world away for a minute, pretend I don't live in it".
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9n5G0qFBsHM
See you again soon
TORTURED
Sunday, 17 May 2015
A system at the brink. (blog 105)
Our system of policing and corruption that lies underneath is a far larger problem than admitted to. It isn't because of a lack of knowledge or educated people speaking out but rather complicit is that it is underscored in our country because I believe that it goes way further up the chain of command and has run riffe throughout our political system right down the rabbit hole through the courts,lawyers, police. How on earth do you stomp out something that is taught to the underlings, applied as a matter of practice.
I am going to add some links from concerned citizens from our Nation, educated and eloquent listen to what they have to say. Additionally I will supply some more links to other issues regarding the same idea. If you have time to read, you tell me what's going on.
I am going to add some links from concerned citizens from our Nation, educated and eloquent listen to what they have to say. Additionally I will supply some more links to other issues regarding the same idea. If you have time to read, you tell me what's going on.
Thursday, 14 May 2015
Streets of everywhere brother...Liberty Bell is cracked and swallows up men. (blog 104)
https://youtu.be/n1NpkXOVJeM
Just something random, but I felt like it.
I often feel that if men show emotion, speak about something close or personal about something they care about or may be dealing with is often washed away and disregarded. We know what this song was written for, most of us have seen the movie. The reason why this was popular was because of the singer and the actors in the movie. Popular for a time.
I do believe that this song is a clear representation of the emotional hell men that are falsely accused go through and the same for those who fight to see their children while they battle the mother in court.
Unless your going through it or went through it , you cannot understand it. Men aren't just brave fools that go to battle. We aren't just those that do the dangerous jobs or are away from home endlessly it would seem for work out of town. We are fathers, Brothers, Friends and we have emotions too. I'm sick of popular culture that minimizes all of these things while furthering by portrayal and bias that we are violent, no good, selfish and uncaring. Even more sick of the men who further this agenda towards their own Gender, Hence his words "faithless kiss" just like Judas did to his brothers.
Tortured
Just something random, but I felt like it.
I often feel that if men show emotion, speak about something close or personal about something they care about or may be dealing with is often washed away and disregarded. We know what this song was written for, most of us have seen the movie. The reason why this was popular was because of the singer and the actors in the movie. Popular for a time.
I do believe that this song is a clear representation of the emotional hell men that are falsely accused go through and the same for those who fight to see their children while they battle the mother in court.
Unless your going through it or went through it , you cannot understand it. Men aren't just brave fools that go to battle. We aren't just those that do the dangerous jobs or are away from home endlessly it would seem for work out of town. We are fathers, Brothers, Friends and we have emotions too. I'm sick of popular culture that minimizes all of these things while furthering by portrayal and bias that we are violent, no good, selfish and uncaring. Even more sick of the men who further this agenda towards their own Gender, Hence his words "faithless kiss" just like Judas did to his brothers.
Tortured
Tuesday, 12 May 2015
May 12,2015.....court day? (blog 103)
Yesterday I was informed that the judge was sick the following week and he wasn't able to deliver his verdict today. The problem as I previously wrote about is that he had 3 months to decide that verdict. So why wait until the last week if he had 3 months? If he knew he was ill for the last week ,why wait until the morning before court to tell us. HMMMM....
At any rate, the man was in court today and true to form I didn't need to attend but the government's layer and my lawyer had to meet at the same place and time in front of him to "reschedule". The problem is one of my supporters attended and enquired and was told in no uncertain terms that she didn't need to be there and additionally my lawyer and the crown and Judge appear to have met somewhere else.
In the end the case was put off until June 15,2015 at 9;00 am and yet they won't say the courtroom number until the morning of. Sound a little odd to you? Scares the hell out of me. It would appear that one of my avid readers just might be those in the Government , court system , whatnot.
A reader brought up a very good point
"sick" is sometimes used as an excuse.This is also sometimes true if a defendant has asked supporters to be in court, and the judge doesn't want them there. Reschedule a few times and they stop showing up."
I Do feel that this individual may be on to something. Until June 15, 2015 I will keep the positive side and work as always, law abiding, good spirited and talk to my Psychiatrist that helps me with the PTSD, He additionally feels that this is all a farce and can't believe the 'system' is doing such things to a person's life.
Until then, thank you for your support and well wishes. I am very sorry to those that rearranged their lives to attend only to be disappointed as I was. I hope you will remain and I'll see you at 9:00 am June 15,2015. Edmonton Alberta courthouse as suggested to me by my attorney " we don't know what courtroom so check the Kiosc for my last name".:))
It would appear that 3 months wasn't enough to deliberate guilt or innocence, 4 is needed. You know, I can't say I have ever even heard of a Murder trial verdict lasting a week let alone 4 months.Considering I am charged with summary charges and not indictable , one can only wonder. The difference between summary and indictable in Canada is the seriousness of them, indictable covers everything from murder,rape, assault...anything violent and summary is the opposite end of the scope, way opposite, say like driving without a license, drunk and disorderly, simple theft,fraud. Any crime is serious but even they have levels of seriousness. 4 months is a little long to deliberate in a judge alone case and to be honest, it wouldn't surprise me one bit that they will finish in secret that which they started in secret. There are times when I wonder if I should have kept my mouth closed and not spoken out about all of this.....
Often it's not popular to do the right thing but it's the right thing to do. Wish more people would speak up.
I remain.
TORTURED.
At any rate, the man was in court today and true to form I didn't need to attend but the government's layer and my lawyer had to meet at the same place and time in front of him to "reschedule". The problem is one of my supporters attended and enquired and was told in no uncertain terms that she didn't need to be there and additionally my lawyer and the crown and Judge appear to have met somewhere else.
In the end the case was put off until June 15,2015 at 9;00 am and yet they won't say the courtroom number until the morning of. Sound a little odd to you? Scares the hell out of me. It would appear that one of my avid readers just might be those in the Government , court system , whatnot.
A reader brought up a very good point
"sick" is sometimes used as an excuse.This is also sometimes true if a defendant has asked supporters to be in court, and the judge doesn't want them there. Reschedule a few times and they stop showing up."
I Do feel that this individual may be on to something. Until June 15, 2015 I will keep the positive side and work as always, law abiding, good spirited and talk to my Psychiatrist that helps me with the PTSD, He additionally feels that this is all a farce and can't believe the 'system' is doing such things to a person's life.
Until then, thank you for your support and well wishes. I am very sorry to those that rearranged their lives to attend only to be disappointed as I was. I hope you will remain and I'll see you at 9:00 am June 15,2015. Edmonton Alberta courthouse as suggested to me by my attorney " we don't know what courtroom so check the Kiosc for my last name".:))
It would appear that 3 months wasn't enough to deliberate guilt or innocence, 4 is needed. You know, I can't say I have ever even heard of a Murder trial verdict lasting a week let alone 4 months.Considering I am charged with summary charges and not indictable , one can only wonder. The difference between summary and indictable in Canada is the seriousness of them, indictable covers everything from murder,rape, assault...anything violent and summary is the opposite end of the scope, way opposite, say like driving without a license, drunk and disorderly, simple theft,fraud. Any crime is serious but even they have levels of seriousness. 4 months is a little long to deliberate in a judge alone case and to be honest, it wouldn't surprise me one bit that they will finish in secret that which they started in secret. There are times when I wonder if I should have kept my mouth closed and not spoken out about all of this.....
Often it's not popular to do the right thing but it's the right thing to do. Wish more people would speak up.
I remain.
TORTURED.
Monday, 11 May 2015
Sooo. at coffee break today I received this email.( blog 102)
At 10:00 oclock this morning I turned on my phone at coffee break and this Email is there.
Saturday, 9 May 2015
Just in case things go horribly wrong for me on Tuesday. (blog 101)
I started a blog shortly before my acquittal that started the whole unnecessary police interactions and subsequent years of courtroom drama. I have had many readers from nearly every Nation on Earth. It wasn't easy to talk about something so tragic in my life and it was quite an emotional rollercoaster just to get the information out. While I worked I would also put in many hours daily pounding out these blogs on a keyboard.
For that I have had nearly 39'000 views in just over a year, hundreds of followers and over a quarter million views on google plus.I have attracted the attention of many in the men's rights movement, senators and lawyers. Also I attracted much unwanted attention from certain groups, personal comments from individuals and in the end I simply value it all and I feel that I have accomplished that which I intended to do and that was to bring awareness to the general public about certain issues.
I fought my ass off and in 4 years it has been very hard on not just my own self but that of my family and friends.
On Tuesday May 12, 2015 the matter is set for a final verdict. My lawyer tells me it's possible that they will judicially stay the charges or I will be found guilty or acquitted.Should I be found guilty, I could effectually be sentenced to Jail right there. the blogs and groups I started will come to a hault.
I ask for your prayers, good energy at 1pm on tuesday, I just want some closure and to pick my life up where it was left 4 years ago.
My thanks to the readers, and I encourage you all to continue to read in support others that have endured what I have, press for change and advocate for restorative justice. I spend the day with my grandkids and it was good for my soul. We went to the park and had ice cream.I adore those kids and I'm so proud how far they have come from being prematurely born. The look they give me while screaming out "popa" is heartwarming. Good thought and energy to help me through the rough times ahead.
I urge you all to take some time, hang out with your grandkids or children. They have a way to teach us to forget the hardships of life.They most certainly not forget the special moments either spent with you.My thanks to those of you who are going to attend alongside of me, offering moral support. I am deeply humbled and appreciative.
Peace to you all and thank you for the prayers and well wishes for Tuesday.
Blessings
Tortured
For that I have had nearly 39'000 views in just over a year, hundreds of followers and over a quarter million views on google plus.I have attracted the attention of many in the men's rights movement, senators and lawyers. Also I attracted much unwanted attention from certain groups, personal comments from individuals and in the end I simply value it all and I feel that I have accomplished that which I intended to do and that was to bring awareness to the general public about certain issues.
I fought my ass off and in 4 years it has been very hard on not just my own self but that of my family and friends.
On Tuesday May 12, 2015 the matter is set for a final verdict. My lawyer tells me it's possible that they will judicially stay the charges or I will be found guilty or acquitted.Should I be found guilty, I could effectually be sentenced to Jail right there. the blogs and groups I started will come to a hault.
I ask for your prayers, good energy at 1pm on tuesday, I just want some closure and to pick my life up where it was left 4 years ago.
My thanks to the readers, and I encourage you all to continue to read in support others that have endured what I have, press for change and advocate for restorative justice. I spend the day with my grandkids and it was good for my soul. We went to the park and had ice cream.I adore those kids and I'm so proud how far they have come from being prematurely born. The look they give me while screaming out "popa" is heartwarming. Good thought and energy to help me through the rough times ahead.
I urge you all to take some time, hang out with your grandkids or children. They have a way to teach us to forget the hardships of life.They most certainly not forget the special moments either spent with you.My thanks to those of you who are going to attend alongside of me, offering moral support. I am deeply humbled and appreciative.
Peace to you all and thank you for the prayers and well wishes for Tuesday.
Blessings
Tortured
Wednesday, 6 May 2015
The Center piece that began my troubles...........(blog 100)
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